{"id":1811,"date":"2016-07-08T02:17:20","date_gmt":"2016-07-08T02:17:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/?p=1811"},"modified":"2023-11-26T10:49:04","modified_gmt":"2023-11-26T10:49:04","slug":"heal-your-marriage-from-home","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/uncategorized\/heal-your-marriage-from-home\/","title":{"rendered":"Heal Your Marriage from Home"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"wpb-content-wrapper\">[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]\n<h2>Why Marriage Counsellors, Psychologists &amp; Psychiatrists Come to Us<\/h2>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #800000;\"><em>Your marriage problems may not be caused by bad things that happened in your childhood, but by the important relationship skills you missed out on learning growing up.<\/em><\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 16px; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;\">By Kim Cooper<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/narcissist\/self-help-for-narcissism\/beyond-dysfunction\/attachment\/beyond-marriage-counselling\/\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-1126\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-1126\" src=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/beyond-marriage-counselling-300x225.jpg\" alt=\"beyond-marriage-counselling\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\" srcset=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/beyond-marriage-counselling-300x225.jpg 300w, https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/beyond-marriage-counselling-150x113.jpg 150w, https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/beyond-marriage-counselling.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><span class=\"dropcap\">I<\/span>n the eight years Steve and I have been publishing our work, we have heard\u00a0the conversation about marriage advice\u00a0change.<\/p>\n<h3>Why Some\u00a0People Decide to Study Psychology<\/h3>\n<p>Quite a few mental health professionals have told me the same story . . .\u00a0 that most people decide to study psychology because they are looking to solve their own problems that are causing them emotional pain.<\/p>\n<p>They study and go on to\u00a0become professionals, without finding the answers they hoped for.<\/p>\n<h3>It\u2019s Not About What Happened &#8211; But What Didn\u2019t<\/h3>\n<p>I saw a moving documentary where the psychologist Gabor Mat\u00e9 said; \u201c<em>Abuse in childhood is when bad things happened that shouldn\u2019t have &#8211; and good things that should have happened didn\u2019t.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-size: 16px; font-family: georgia, palatino;\"><strong>~ Select any text on this page to see our <em>share on Twitter and Facebook function ~<\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p>Psychologists and psychiatrists can certainly help with unresolved pain and confusion leftover from past trauma (we have an excellent program for this <a href=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/blog\/heal\/\">here<\/a>), but if you struggle with your relationships, no matter how painful the trauma from your childhood, the trouble in your marriage may have been caused by something different.<\/p>\n<p>Your marriage problems may not be caused by bad things that happened in your childhood, but by the important relationship skills you missed out on learning growing up.<\/p>\n<p>I discovered these relationship skills have everything to do with healthy emotional regulation, which is also sometimes called emotional intelligence.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #22063d;\">Many marriages fail because one (or both) partners have never had positive role models to learn good relationship skills from.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>This modelling needs to happen consistently and also works best between people with an emotional connection. The obvious conclusion we can draw from this is that rather than sitting talking about your problems in a consultation room, the influence needs to start at home.<\/p>\n<p>This is not something yet taught by standard psychology professionals and is why, because of the privacy of our website, very often they come to learn from us.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column]<div class=\"vcex-module vcex-teaser wpex-flex wpex-flex-col wpex-text-center\"><div class=\"vcex-teaser-media wpex-mb-20\"><a href=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/free-intro\/a-great-marriage\/\" class=\"wpex-no-underline\"><img width=\"698\" height=\"396\" src=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/better-marriage.png\" class=\"wpex-align-middle\" alt=\"Better marriage - heart and stethoscope\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" srcset=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/better-marriage.png 698w, https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/better-marriage-150x85.png 150w, https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/better-marriage-300x170.png 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 698px) 100vw, 698px\" \/><\/a><\/div><div class=\"vcex-teaser-content\"><h2 class=\"vcex-teaser-heading wpex-heading wpex-text-lg\"><a href=\"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/free-intro\/a-great-marriage\/\" class=\"wpex-no-underline\">Creating a great marriage requires skill<\/a><\/h2><\/div><\/div>[\/vc_column][\/vc_row]\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text] Why Marriage Counsellors, Psychologists &amp; Psychiatrists Come to Us Your marriage problems may not be caused by bad things that happened in your childhood, but by the important relationship skills you missed out on learning growing up. By Kim Cooper In the eight years Steve and I have been publishing our work, we have&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1126,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"post_series":[84],"class_list":["post-1811","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","post_series-articles","entry","has-media"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1811","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1811"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1811\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1811"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1811"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1811"},{"taxonomy":"post_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/narcissismcured.com\/thencmarriage\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_series?post=1811"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}